"Where did you hear that word?" I asked. "School," he said as he stomped away. This got me thinking about the differences between boys and girls. Once you have a son, you understand so much more about your husband and realize that all of the annoying little things grown men do isn't their fault. It's chromosomal.
My friends with girls only have to spend just one hour in the same room with my son before they ask, "How do you keep up with him?" My friends who have sons say, "Just wait until he's 16. He'll act the same but be only bigger."
For example, several years ago when my son was around 3 years old, I was helping him use the restroom. My husband came up behind us and said in horror, "What are you doing to him!?" I looked surprised and said, "Well, I'm blotting his little willy with toilet paper." My husband nearly had a heart attack. "He's going to get beaten up before he enters first grade by doing that. Boys don't do that. We shake it."
Now, I understand why our bathrooms are in the state they are in.
So, people coming to my home don't even have to ask if there's a boy around. The evidence is everywhere. The top five leads are:
1. The bathrooms are a mess
2. The sound of slamming doors is constant
3. Legos are in the vacuum cleaner's canister
4. There is a mud puddle (or as my son says "a swamp habitat") in the backyard at all times
5. Trees have marks of being beaten with golf clubs, swords, hammers and other metal objects
So, last night at 9 p.m. as we were relaxing after having Easter dinner with my family, our son bolts in with his latest prize - a green lizard. He was so excited to show us, he tripped in the doorway letting loose of the lizard. Not to be called a buzz kill again, I tried to remain calm. As of this writing, the lizard is still at large in the house.
Wondering how long is it possible for a renegade lizard to survive indoors?
The Wondering Texan
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| Good thing our boy is fenced in to protect the cows. |
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